Diotrephes Abused Jesus's Teachings
In Matthew 18:15-17, Jesus provides clear instructions on how to handle conflict within the church, emphasizing the importance of reconciliation and accountability. However, the story of Diotrephes in 3 John illustrates how these teachings can be misused when personal ambition and pride take precedence over humility and love.
Diotrephes’s actions serve as a cautionary tale of how even the most well-intentioned teachings can be twisted to serve selfish purposes, undermining the unity and mission of the church.
Jesus’s Teaching on Healthy Relationship Management
In Matthew 18:15-17, Jesus outlines a step-by-step process for addressing conflict among believers:
Private Confrontation: “Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother” (Matthew 18:15, KJV). The first step in resolving conflict is to address the issue privately. This approach aims to preserve the dignity of both parties and to resolve the matter without causing unnecessary public scandal.
Bringing Witnesses: “But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established” (Matthew 18:16, KJV). If private confrontation fails, the next step is to involve one or two witnesses. This step ensures that the situation is handled fairly and that the truth can be established through multiple testimonies.
Involving the Church: “And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican” (Matthew 18:17, KJV). If the person still refuses to repent, the matter is brought before the church. If they persist in their wrongdoing, they are to be treated as an outsider, not as an act of punishment, but as a means to bring them to repentance.
Jesus’s teaching in this passage is rooted in love, mercy, and the desire for reconciliation. It is not meant to be a tool for control or exclusion, but rather a means to restore broken relationships within the body of Christ.
The Sad Example of Diotrephes in 3 John
In contrast to Jesus’s instructions in Matthew 18:15-17, the Apostle John’s letter in 3 John highlights the actions of Diotrephes, a church leader who abused his position of authority.
John writes:
“I wrote unto the church: but Diotrephes, who loveth to have the preeminence among them, receiveth us not. Wherefore, if I come, I will remember his deeds which he doeth, prating against us with malicious words: and not content therewith, neither doth he himself receive the brethren, and forbiddeth them that would, and casteth them out of the church” (3 John 1:9-10, KJV).
Diotrephes’s behavior is a stark refusal to hear God's principles of church discipline can be misapplied. Instead of using his authority to promote unity and reconciliation, Diotrephes sought to elevate himself above others, rejecting the apostolic authority of John and excluding those who disagreed with him from the church. His actions were not motivated by a desire to restore relationships but by a desire for power and control.
How Diotrephes Misused Matthew 18:15-17
Diotrephes’s misuse of Matthew 18:15-17 is evident in several ways:
Pride and Preeminence: Diotrephes “loveth to have the preeminence” (3 John 1:9, KJV). His desire for power led him to abuse the process of church discipline. Instead of approaching conflict with humility and a desire for reconciliation, Diotrephes used his position to assert his dominance and control over others. This is the opposite of the spirit of humility that Jesus advocates in Matthew 18:15-17.
Exclusion Rather than Reconciliation: Diotrephes’s actions were aimed at excluding others from the church, rather than seeking reconciliation. He “casteth them out of the church” (3 John 1:10, KJV), a far cry from the restorative approach Jesus outlined. The purpose of Jesus’s teaching was to bring about repentance and restoration, not to sever relationships or create divisions within the church.
Rejecting Apostolic Authority: Diotrephes’s refusal to accept John’s authority further demonstrates his misuse of church discipline. By rejecting the apostle’s guidance and refusing to welcome fellow believers, Diotrephes placed himself above the very principles of accountability and submission to godly leadership that Jesus taught. This undermined the unity of the church and created an environment of fear and division.
Contemporary Lessons for Modern Believers
The example of Diotrephes serves as a warning to the modern church about the dangers of misusing biblical teachings for personal gain. Jesus’s instructions in Matthew 18:15-17 are meant to foster a spirit of humility, love, and reconciliation within the church. When these principles are distorted by pride and a desire for control, the result is division, exclusion, and spiritual harm.
Church leaders and members alike must be vigilant in ensuring that conflict resolution processes are carried out in the spirit of Christ’s teachings. This means approaching conflict with a genuine desire for reconciliation, being willing to submit to godly authority, and resisting the temptation to use church discipline as a tool for personal gain.
Additionally, the church must be cautious of leaders who, like Diotrephes, seek to elevate themselves above others and misuse their authority. True spiritual leadership is marked by humility, service, and a commitment to the well-being of the entire congregation. When leaders stray from these principles, it is the responsibility of the church to hold them accountable, in accordance with the teachings of Christ.
Conclusion
Jesus’s teaching on conflict resolution in Matthew 18:15-17 is a powerful tool for maintaining unity and promoting reconciliation within the church. However, as the example of Diotrephes in 3 John shows, these teachings can be misused when personal ambition and pride take precedence over humility and love.
The church must remain vigilant in ensuring that the principles of accountability and reconciliation are upheld, and that those in leadership positions are guided by the spirit of Christ, rather than by a desire for power and control. In doing so, the church can fulfill its mission to be a beacon of love, unity, and truth in a divided world.
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