As surprising as it may sound, there are church overseers which make you question everything.
VII. Conclusion
What is an Overseer?
An overseer is a faith leader who can inspire, uplift, and bring the greatest truths to light. As an Overseer myself, we cannot claim any credit for this. It is God who reveals the “deeper mysteries” of the faith.
We just pass these things along to whomever God sends. Put more simply - we are just not that smart not matter who says different.
We need these men and women to challenge us to get back to the Lord. I need someone to challenge me back to the same place! If you are shocked, you should not be.
The Holy Bible says (Romans 3:23):
But as much as we love having them, not every Overseer will lead you to a deeper relationship with the Lord.
Some will destroy your concept of truth, make you question God, or worse!
The Bible has much to say about these sorts. Believe me, Jesus Christ is not happy and will deal with them HARSHLY.
Here is what Jesus promised these faith destroyers (Matthew 7:21-23):
As a church Overseer, I am around these “villains” and understand how they think and operate. It may surprise you, but many don’t believe the Word they preach in its totality!
Forgive my harsh language, however, since I have access most do not, I’ve seen things you cannot imagine. I am not someone who writes on websites like this having not confronted those the Bible takes issue with either.
It has been my most extreme honor to confront these "fake christians" who rob God's people of hope and dignity.
Yet I have also become aware it is my responsibility to disciple God’s people wherever they are.
So many of God's Sheep are in unhealthy spiritual relationships with leader(s). I see this all of the time, and my heart is broken because of it.
Understand one thing: your leader is no more precious to God, necessary to the kingdom, or immune from Godly rebuke than anyone else.
You will not go to hell because you speak truth in love! We are not Roman Catholics who treat their priests as “untouchable princes of the church.”
People like you have had their faith overthrown and died apart from God because some wayward Overseer/Church Elder destroyed their faith.
Here are traits of Overseers which will have you questioning everything you believe.
Overseers Who Always Have to be Right
Let’s get something out of the way quickly. The Bible tells us that: “if anyone says they have no sin they are a liar and the truth is not in them.”
That statement is in the current pretense, and levels an accusation at the entire human race. Neither you, loved ones, or church leader are always right. Yet we know there are some who just have to be regardless of the damage it causes.
I served such an irresponsible Church Overseer and eventually, this was a catalyst for my family and I walking away. He has become dangerous to his family, mine, and the church in general.
They have damaged the cause of Christ in ways most cannot imagine. Even the great Apostle Paul never pretended to always be right. "Never wrongs" are part from God and mock Him in their heart(s).
In the city where I live, honest leaders who admit wrong are hard to find. Those who confront them with the Word of God are even more rare. For those who dare confront them, we are shunned and mocked.
Unfortunately, most church Overseers are more interest in “ministry accomplishment” than following the Will of God. This results in the desires of their belly being presented as God’s will for your church.
If anyone challenges them, they are branded “troublemakers” and “pew pastors.”
Why?
Because Overseers are always right and by golly, anyone who says different is a worker of evil! Most parishioners who love them enough to speak truth have even been accused of "standing against the vision."
This is a "mind trick" to deceive the bold in Jesus into thinking they are "standing against God."
To justify their defiance, they misquote scripture like (Psalms 105:14-15):
Leaders no longer in God’s Will think everything they do and say is sanctioned by God. They don’t want to surrender their whole hearts to Jesus Christ but demand YOU do so.
Further, they spiritually abuse God’s people and manipulate free will. Such ungodliness exploits guilt to force people into things they otherwise would not take part in.
The Overseer That is Unjust
You absolutely need an Overseer who is warm and welcoming. He should be humble enough to ask questions and learn more about God's people.
However, there are leaders who are unjust in their dealings with people.
They shame people they don’t approve of, but not others whom they “prefer.” Worse, they do the same things they preach “at” you for! An unjust Overseer will shame those who do not bend to their will.
This is in exact opposition to how Jesus treated those who disagreed with Him. When Jesus did confront people, they required it and He did the same to those closest to Him.
Who can forget this encounter with His disciple Peter (Matthew 16:22-23):
It doesn't matter that what you are doing may not be ungodly. The point is “unjust control” is the end in itself and not a closer relationship with Jesus Christ.
We are in a dangerous spiritual condition when holding others to standards we cannot meet ourselves. This is the proverbial “beam in your own eye” Jesus spoke of in Matthew Chapter 7.
Further, this is rank hypocrisy! Hypocrites, by nature, are ALWAYS unfair and not pleasing to the Lord. For instance, can a someone with a bad temper admonish others struggling with the same?
Being unjust takes on many different forms and those who make this a ministry seed the doubts of others.
The Micro-Manager Who Trusts No One
I detest this type of behavior more than many others. It demonstrates a total lack of faith in God, while showing little trust in His people.
To begin with, this is wrong because it is a direct contradiction of "faith." This is amazing because our Savior, Jesus Christ, trusted His Disciples, and thereby us.
He trusted us with the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19-20):
God has given you gifting to perform some function in the Kingdom. This gift is required to build the local body alongside your Overseer and leader.
However, many not being allowed to “walk in this gifting” is a regular occurrence.
If you feel like leadership is always hovering over you, he/she is a micro-manager. The dishonest ones hide behind: "we are supposed to watch the sheep." While this is true, it doesn't mean removing free will.
They demand you do things the right way. However, no matter how many times you’ve demonstrated excellence, they still show no trust in who God called you to be. If you feel like you are always being watched, you have a leadership problem!
You need to pray about getting away and here is why. When someone you admire questions your gifts and performance enough times, it begins to weigh on you.
This process always ends in doubt, discouragement, and ultimately over-thrown faith. Perhaps you haven’t thought this far ahead, however, it isn’t YOU they distrust - it is God!
I will leave you with that to ponder.
Just about every issue we deal with comes from lack of faith and/or control-based struggles. Insecure and fearful Overseers will make you question everything you believe if allowed to continue.
They will make you feel unworthy, and this will make you question your faith.
If you love them, confront them ASAP. Yes, the Bible allows you to confront church leaders with truth!
Here are Jesus’ Words on the matter (Matthew 18:15-17):
Who did Jesus exclude from being confronted in this text? NO ONE!
Lack of Sermonic Growth
If your leader is the same person as when you first met, they are stuck in a rut. This isn’t always a bad thing, however.
Lack of change could provide needed stability to an unstable congregation. But if they have shown an effort to change and grow, then embrace this! I am not suggesting changing and growing out of who God created them, or you, to be.
This would make you less than authentic. Yet does the preacher still struggle with the same sin/issues as when he/she first began to lead?
Nothing is more indicative of distance from God than lack of spiritual growth. One cannot come into a close encounter with the Lord, consistently, and remain the same.
Seriously, how many people came into contact with Jesus and remained untouched Now, when I say "untouched", I indicate Jesus always presented a decision by His mere presence.
Even those who rejected Him were never the same. They had made a choice for "hell" and had gotten their wish.
If you pay attention to how their preaching develops (or not), you will be able to righteously judge where they are with the Lord. I mean, we, as your leaders, do this all the time!
I know you have been told: "we don't judge anyone!" That is a lie, from the pit of Hell. Preaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ, to a wicked world, is JUDGING.
Growth in preaching means personal growth in Jesus. Then, and only then, can you grow as well. Ever noticed that it isn't only the driver who gets lost having failed to either ask or follow directions?
Everyone in the car is lost as well.
Overseers Who Bully from the Pulpit
As a currently serving Pastor, let me make this clear: “pulpits are not bull pits.” Our platforms are not to be used to “bull doze” people while claiming to represent Jesus Christ.
Too often, church leaders use the pulpit, and its authority, to go after their enemies in the congregation and community. Going after “our” enemies is not pleasing to God and is unfair to His people.
Bullies are people who value control over a loving and healthy relationship with others. Those skilled in the Word are (or can be) the most effective abusers alive!
It is one thing to be disrespectful in everyday life. Often times, this is obvious to those viewing it and suffering through it. It is something entirely different when the same behavior comes from a spiritual leader.
However, the fear of standing against someone who say they are represent God is much greater. I can run away from someone I know is not representing Jesus and abuses me.
Getting away from someone who I believe is my conduit to God is another matter entirely.
This is not me suggesting anyone should stand in the way of your relationship with the Lord. When Jesus died, the veil of the temple was ripped so you have access just as much as we.
Conclusion
Now you understand some traits of an abusive overseer, let’s make sure you are in a place to confront them.
Before going there, are you sure the strained relationship isn't your fault? We often don’t get along with people who remind us of ourselves. I know that sounds crazy but it is sometimes true.
As a congregant, are you sure it is you who are being abusive to your Overseer?
The devil is a master at accusing others of doing what he is doing. Although I am not political, the Democratic Party has mastered this deceptive tactic.
When you read 1st Corinthians 13, you find out what love truly is. All of these traits listed have one thing in common: lack of self-control while trying to control others.
As I said previously, every sin can be traced back to someone not being able to adequately restrain themselves from doing evil. This is why your relationship with the Church Overseer is so crucial to monitor.
They cannot control you and you cannot control them. When people try and control one another’s behavior, they are stepping outside of the parameters outlined by the Holy Bible (Free Will).
Adam and Eve were not forced, nor did God try to control their choices. He simply provided them choice, and allowed them to decide.
None of us are commissioned to rob anyone of their free will. This is demonic manipulation and must be rejected at every turn.
If your church leader is a demonic manipulator, you need to either confront them or get away. Having Pastored for some years now, I say with experience, if you stay in a spiritually abusive relationship, you will begin to abuse God as well.
How do I abuse God?
Not exercising a healthy relationship with him through the Word. Your leader is already at that place and the Bible is clear: “bad company corrupts good character.”
You do not owe anyone your eternal life with Jesus Christ. Further, you owe no one your spiritual and mental health. Although it may not be as overt, subtle spiritual abuse is just as bad as physical abuse.
Get away now before it is too late.
Header Image Courtesy of Momento Media @ Unsplash